I was gonna blog today but...
I have work tomorrow.
Yeah you heard me.
Before you all get too excited, it's just a temporary job.
Here's the catch though;
Tomorrow is 'jeans day' at the office I'm going to.
"Okay," I said to the girl on the phone, when she told me.
"Nice jeans," she said.
"Absolutely no rips or tears," she said. "No fraying."
"Right," I said, because this is kind of a no-brainer, you know?
"And you have to wear heels," she said.
"What?" I said.
"Closed-toe heels," she said. "If you wear open-toe, you have to have had a pedicure within the last week."
Um? I understand looking nice, but to qualify pedicures like that? Am I a geisha? Should I bring a fan with me too?
"I can't wear nice flats?" I said.
"On jeans day, we have to wear heels," she said. "And a nice top. Absolutely no tee-shirt material. And do you have a blazer?"
"Yes?" I said.
"You should wear the blazer," she said. "And a scarf. Silk, if you have it. And jewlery. And makeup."
"Okay," I said.
"Make sure you have makeup on," she said.
"Gotcha," I said.
"It's important that you wear makeup," she said.
Jesum crow, you guys. At this rate the job isn't going to be an excuse to go shopping. I'm going to have to wear a red lip every goddamn day just for my job security.
I spent the afternoon making my downstairs neighbors hate me by clomping around in my only black patent heels in order to remind myself what they're like. Finding an outfit that fit her exact qualifications was tricky. A nice shirt with a blazer with a scarf?! Can I please call the "too much" police?
I'll post the outfit tomorrow. Looking forward to it! Are you all pumped?
This is unrelated, but funny:
This is unrelated, but terrifying: